Dear Sharebros and Sharebras,

Some of you have expressed concerns about our new apartment’s exorbitant rent. But we can assure you that we’re perfectly capable of paying the rent without any problems. In fact we really don’t understand how this rent thing became a meme – it’s just very comfortably within our collective budget.

Now switching gears to a totally different topic, we want to let you know that we’re having a housewarming party! And it’s absolutely free!

We are, however, offering a few different ticket packages for those guests who wish to opt for a Premium Experience here at Tom, Rich & Dan’s Apartment (TRDA):



Friend of TRDA – $150

• Use of Tom’s VIP bathroom (Max. 2 trips, left sink only)
• 2 Pima Cotton Polo Shirts with TRDA logo
  

Sponsor of TRDA – $300

• Exclusive tour of Rich’s walk-in closet
• Meet-and-Greet Pre-Party with TRDA residents
• Use of Tom’s VIP bathroom (Unlimited, either sink)
• 4 Pima Cotton Polo Shirts with TRDA logo

Patron of TRDA – $1000+

• Plaque on TRDA “Walk of Fame” in Foyer
• Exclusive tour of Rich’s walk-in closet with Rich himself
• Meet-and-Greet Pre-Pre-Party with TRDA residents
• Use of Tom’s VIP bathroom (Unlimited, including shower)
• 16 Pima Cotton Polo Shirts with TRDA logo
• Access to TRDA Washer-Dryer in case of stain on TRDA polo shirts

So guys, seriously, come, it’ll be fun, and there’s no pressure to be a Patron of TRDA – if you just want to be a Friend of TRDA that’s cool too. And if you want to come without paying, great – just put “Standing Room Basic Ticket” in your RSVP (for our records).

Here are the details (which are automatically re-sent to you the day before the party if you come as a Sponsor or Patron!):

Tom, Rich & Dan’s Housewarming Party

Friday, March 18

10 PM

184 Kent Ave, Apt. C-411

Hope to see you guys there!

Okay, I can't believe it but this is the real deal. I'm not kidding, at all JohnMarkKarrNow:

Today, I visited precious JonBenét - another of those sweet moments talking to her and feeling the closeness that I can only feel when I am near her grave. And in front of her lies her wonderful mommy. So much I must say to her on every visit with words that fall short in every utterance. It was a beautiful day - warm zephyrs and whirling colors of yellow and red. But lying beneath the cold earth is my Princess never to be revived again - my endless guilt dedicated to her. I see her in another place as well - in her sweet Paradise, for no angel, as was she, could reside in less than the perfection of God in an eternity specially made for a child that was too much for this world. And in all the appreciation she received on this earth from all of us who loved her, no accolade was perfect enough for my darling Princess who is now in the presence of a perfect love and the ultimate exaltation that she so deserved. Lovely, precious, beautiful, darling JonBenét - oh to be in your
presence once more.

I found this mildly amusing, if a little disrespectful (from this site).

Okay, more breaking news. Apparently, according to Wikipedia, the author of the Virginia Tech Massacre, in one of his numerous manifestos sent to NBC on the day of the killing (good choice of networks), railed against John Mark Karr. That's right. So, I think it's safe to extrapolate from this association that JMK was fully responsible for the VT Massacre. You heard it hear first.

Some serious breaking news here people. John Mark Karr's third son is called Seven Exodus Karr. I know, I know hard to believe, JMK's kid has a crazy name. What is strange is that the first two sons were named John and Damon. What on earth could have prompted Karr and his wife to make this strange nomenclatural distinction between their children? More details as they emerge.

Karr got some serious media attention. Like, Time Magazine serious (okay, I know that's actually synonymous with un-serious in these bloggin' days, but hey!). Not to mention the amazing media hulabalu in Thailand and the states back in August 2006 (one year after the Holloway frenzy/Sheehan protest reached their respective peaks... No coincidence!).This picture is the most real emblem of the story, the way Karr's flaccid body lies back in the comforting grip of the Thai authorities, it is a beautiful embodiment of this poor man's fate in the eyes of our all-fondling media. Look at this next image in the same light:Notice how the bulletproof glass' partition divides Karr's face. Of all the images, was the one where our hero's visage is divided necessary? No, far better to go with something like this, something that contains the image of our truth in its full vitality:This rail-thin, blue-shirted man is each of us. All fall under the encapsulating seizure of the lens.

This story isn't even close to being over, people.

How has the MSM allowed this very crucial issue to fade from our view as they debate the "election"... Ha! Longtime readers will know of my deep-held contempt for democracy. It is nothing but authorized mob-rule, and what could be more horrifying?

Mr. Karr's plight (his persecution) is a prime example of all of the wrongs a so called "free" democracy can inflict upon a completely innocent individual.

My colleague Nostradamus Marquis composed a number of oddly appropriate tributes to Mr. Karr back in 2006 when this story first surfaced. I find it appropriate to repost said numbers here now:

John Mark Karr (II)


John Mark Karr (IV)